Matt Elliott’s Online

Nostalgia + Confusion = Nostusion

A small part of me always hoped that at this point in my life I would already know everything there is to know. Because, really, I’ve covered the big stuff. I’ve figured out how to do laundry and drive a car. I now know how to support myself financially. I can pay bills and have a pretty good credit rating. I even sort of understand women — at least enough to have finally duped one into being with me.

Isn’t that enough? Shouldn’t I be able to sit back now and bask in my accumulated knowledge? Isn’t it about time, now that I’m approaching a quarter-century in age, that I finally take on that wizened, world-weary oracle-type, dispensing advice like baby food to the younger generation, scooping it out in bug gooey glumps and guiding it into so many metaphorical mouths?

I’m still learning a lot.

The other day I realized I’ve been confusing, in my memories, my 8th grade science teacher with my 12th grade Finite Math teacher. This really shouldn’t be that big a deal. It’s not like I spend a lot of time thinking about these teachers. And they were both pretty similar looking dudes. Both sort of short, brown hair, balding, with that stern demeanor that seems to always scream “I am really fascinated by boring stuff.”

One was Mr. de Graaf. The other Mr. Capron. I’m pretty sure, having thought hard about it now, that Mr. de Graaf was the science teacher, and Capron the math. But I can’t be 100% sure. I’d say I’m only 98% convinced that I’m right. And it’s that missing 2% that’s got me thinking, all over again, about how I still have a lot to learn.

Here’s the thing — when I was a teenager, I thought I was doing my real serious learning. I thought I was experiencing the definitive years of my life. They would be rough, and they’d suck, and I’d spend way too much time thinking stupid things about love and sex and trivial things, but in the end I’d come out of them with a strong foundation of where I should be going.

But, with that 2% uncertainty over the names of my teachers, that time in my life is already fading away. And I’m left wondering: if that was such a pivotal time, then how come it’s leaving me?

So this is how I’m starting my month of updates. At a new space in a new life. Thinking about nostalgia and confusion, and how if you combine the words together you get either “Nostusion” or “Confalgia”, both of which are very very funny words.

I’ll be updating this site every day for the remainder of June.

True.

I had a similarish experience the other day. I decided to save myself $10 and, in lieu of seeing the universally-eh Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, I rented Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade from Netflix.

It turns out that, even though I had rented Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark no more than two years ago, I distinctly recall several Last Crusades scenes actually being in Raiders. I thought that that whole tomb-under-the-library and almost-getting-crushed-by-a-tank parts were in Raiders. I was about 90% certain of this. I was, of course, completely wrong.

Then again, these memories stem from some vague late-80s, early-90s era that, at best, is hazy. Case in point is that I remember seeing Batman in a movie theater but I remember nothing about the Gulf War.

And also, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade is a much better memory of a movie than an actual movie.

Jack, your comment totally inspired me to write a post about the Indiana Jones series and how I refuse to rewatch any of the old ones because they all still seem so awesome in my head and I don’t want to risk ruining that.

Hell, I’m not even sure I’ve even SEEN all of Raiders — most of my memories of it seem to overlap with the plot of the Indiana Jones Stunt Show at Disney World — but, still, they’re all treasured memories.

I don’t really remember Gulf War I too. I think that’s generally what happens when wars have sequels, though — the original gets forgotten. Look at World War I: nobody has any real idea what happened. The textbooks are literally like “Everyone just got mad at each other and then fought.”

Crazy.

Just so you know – Mr. DeGraaf was your grade 8 science teacher – pretty impressive that I remember that at my age, isn’t it!!!

[...] yesterday’s nerdy post about the iPhone, that I had actually already completed my promise to post every day for the month of June. I’m technically done. I don’t have any promise to myself to keep [...]